Just like adults, Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages can apply to children. Learning to identify and understand how your child receives love can help make your relationship with your child even more meaningful. Though you might feel that you are trying to love your child as much as possible, there may be an even better way for you to show them love. The five languages are words of affirmation, acts of service, gifts, quality time and physical touch. We’ll dive into each one and how you can use it to show your child love.
Words of Affirmation
Random compliments or words of encouragement can be extremely meaningful for your child. Try placing a note in their lunchbox or backpack before they head off to school. Tell them you’re proud of them when they discuss an accomplishment. Remember to express belief in their abilities when you drop them off for school if they have a test or sporting event that day. If you notice that your child did something different that morning (like wearing a special outfit or doing their hair a certain way – anything that took a bit of extra effort) make sure to tell them. Acknowledge their effort and accomplishments can be exactly what they need to hear.
Acts of Service
Acts of service don’t have to be huge and time consuming. Instead, it’s an opportunity for you to show your child that you’re aware of their needs and are willing to take the time to help them. Try asking them if they need help with homework or a project they are working on. Pack their lunch before school or make them a snack after. Even teaching them a new skill they’ve been wanting to learn can count as an act of service.
Gifts
For people who have gifts as their love language, the gifts don’t necessarily have to be often or expensive. Gifts can be meaningful to your child even without the price tag. Handmade gifts also work well. Creating a drawing or handmade card for them can put a smile on their face. Small trinkets, packs of gum or individual candies can work as well.
Quality Time
Taking the time to give your child undivided attention is the key to quality time. Whether its just listening to them share about a book they read or something interesting they learned at school, listening to their interests shows so much love. Showing love through quality time can also be done by doing an activity that they love one-on-one such as reading, playing sports, cooking or anything else they enjoy.
Physical Touch
Children that love physical touch need to physically feel love. Giving spontaneous hugs, kisses and cuddles could be just what they need. Holding hands while walking, braiding hair and doing nails are other ways to connect with you kids.
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